Don't Let This Moment of Clarity End

Dear Self,

You know what you need to do and how to do it. Rid yourself of all of the ridiculous roadblocks that inhibit you this school year. If you can't get rid of them, ignore them in hopes that they will go away. Prioritize:

1. Teach your students.

2. Write curriculum and participate in PD when it will help you teach better. (psst...remember, you're a teacher, right?)

3. When you are called to do something that is other than the first two things, think, "Did I take care of my first two priorities before I take on this one? Will this task help me with my first two priorities?"

If the answer to that question is, "NO!" then let someone else do it. You have a baby girl who needs your time and attention and love when you are not at work. In order to properly teach your students, most of the time you set aside for work outside your workday needs to be in preparation for your own students. If you don't do this, then you must sacrifice more time with your lovely daughter, just to help others in your school building. This does not help you to be prepared for your first priority, forget even doing the second well. The other priorities in your work life must somehow be put onto the back-burner or taken care of in some other way. Lead by example, not by writing down what an example should be. Currently, what you know and what you practice are not aligned because you spread yourself too thin!

Self, align your teaching with what your beliefs are and forget everything and everyone else that is unnecessary!

Do it for your sanity, your intellect and your baby!

Love,

You

I'm writing a book...

I've heard a dozen people say this in the past week, but could this really be possible? Perhaps I hang out with lots of really interesting, smart people...

I would like to add myself to this list. I officially feel like my school year has started. This is a very untimely event, seeing that today is the last day of school and all. Just last week I met my class and just today I looked through their running records and math assessments and moved my belongings into a new classroom. Naturally it's time for all of the mental planning to start!

I already cannot sleep. I need to set up my classroom. If I don't figure out how to put the rug just so in the next couple of weeks, I may not sleep for 2 months. This probably will not happen until August, and even then, I may only be able to set up some tables and chairs. It's a start. I will actually need a rug before I can position it just so. I don't even have library books to organize into baskets. I moved into a classroom that used to be a performing arts room, which is neat because it's pretty empty, however, there isn't any grade specific stuff to organize.

You see, I've been a mathematics coach for the past two years, so the ending of this school year seems pretty unofficial. Last June I was still on maternity leave, so I didn't know what it would feel like to have the school year end without 20 something children leaving you for the summer. Today I saw a teacher in tears and actually wished that I was crying too. I love those years. You know the ones, when your class (that you couldn't stand when they started the year) is now so lovely. They know you and they know each other and we all know how to get each other smart. You are all in some sort of love and now it's ending. They'll see you in the hall and give you a hug or a 'finger-wave' and be on their way...ahhh, then you get to do it all again, starting over from the part where you can't stand your class. Maybe that's why I cried year after year-happy that the kids had come so far, but maybe underneath all of that, sad that I would have to try to do this thing all over again!

That's how I knew that I had made the right decision about going back into the classroom. I decided to for many reasons, most of them selfish ones, but all good reasons. One reason is because I have always dreamed of writing a book about teaching and putting 'it all' in really well. Teaching younger kids is like orchestrating a masterful symphony if done well and is FAR from easy. Hopefully, I have a good (and by good I mean realistic) year and can live to tell about it. I wanted to call it 'Teaching with Intention" but Debbie Miller already used that title recently! I thumbed through her book the other day and realized that what she was writing about is really in line with my thinking, and since I've always loved (idolized at a time) Debbie Miller, it's okay that she stole my title. I still love the title and now need to find some way to encompass intentionally doing EVERYTHING into a neat title. When I say everything, I mean everything. There is a method to the madness that goes on in my head about so much that goes on the classroom-the writing tools, the paper we use, the songs we sing, the way we sit, the language we use, the stories we read and so much more. This year I will not write a book but instead try my best to chronicle all of the work that goes on behind what happens in the classroom. Ideally, I'd like to use this blog as a vehicle for writing. A warning for you as a reader is that there will be times that what I write makes no sense. This shouldn't be a problem since I only have one follower. The non-sensical stuff will probably be in a list format, just to hold onto my ideas while I change a diaper or feed Grace some dinner. I stopped blogging when I had Grace and would love to get back into it, but it's so hard! I even thought that I could hold off until closer to the school year, but no, it cannot wait! I had forgotten that in order for me to get ready for a successful school year I start so much of that work now. So, let the lists begin and the summer feel long. Please come along for the ride with me if you choose to do so!